Sunday, June 14, 2009

oh my god

I will admit to posting a Craigslist ad. Here. http://westernmass.craigslist.org/w4w/1205824024.html

As you can tell, it's not very serious.

I got THIS REPLY.

It's long. But worth it? Hilarious parts in bold.

"Hi Broke College Student..... First of all let me say that I appreciate your desires for a female and understand your feelings somewhat. I'm an older dad type who'd like to offer you this email to peruse over and see if anything would fit your desires ... I'm thinking that maybe a pleasure fee would help you out a little :) and I'm NOT looking to get into your panties at all.
Also as a side note, I have rented a room to college students for about 8 years and 3 of them were lesbians. I found them to be considerate, fun and very happy with their friends. NO!! I didn't get involved as I respect everyone's lifestyle, but just put this in for your reference. If you'd like to take a little break from things and relax, then this may appeal to you. You read and decide. No push, no pressure, just some time to openly relax, chill and forget about "everything". YES!! I'll say this up front, I'm a lot older than you're looking for (never mind the different gender)but also I have the patience and respect for you as a person...NOT looking to "get in your pants, panties (depends on your fem "gender") or other sexual things, that guys are looking for ...
Please read this through and find out if you could enjoy an evening where YOU are the center of attention, but don't have to reciprocate at all - and can totally relax and enjoy yourself.
OK, here's my email.
I'm an older, learning, Dom type of guy who's into the pleasure aspect of things.

This is a very safe scene with some self-exploration for you which will result in "hot fun". I was also brought up to respect women. If you read this email and picture yourself as the center of attention - NOT having to worry about anything - you'll find your mind will reach into depths of pleasure you haven't delved into lately.

Some things can be done with "sensual" feelings AND in a respectable manner; this is one of them. I'm NOT looking to hit on you directly, but to build a night of "pleasurable fun" with toys for you.

Toys are popular with females and you'll be well pleasured over a vibrator gently placed on your privates. I've had several discreet sessions with younger females along these lines - very well respected and respect your desires/limits also. I'm discreet, clean, and provide a safe, consensual atmosphere to play in.

Your laying on a comfortable massage table (light blanket covering you) and have been gently massaged for about an hour...a vibrator is placed on your mound. I guide your hands so you can work it yourself - with the sensual massage, you'll be in a very receptive mood.

A little lube and you're ready for pleasure...Cotton in your ears will decrease the background noise so you'll hear your OWN SOUNDS of pleasure more. I'll caress your neck, hair line, cheeks, upper breast area...a warm start.
I have 15 of the most popular toys that females use. More than your average girls variety. E. G. have you used multiple vibrators at the same time? have you used them on another female? have you been fitted for a strap-on lately? More!!

The idea here is to have an exploratory time utilizing toys: "relaxing" with yourself for an evening. A night devoted to your body absorbing pleasures created by you and your mind feeling the effects of very hot, orgasmic/pleasurable fun. YES!! Fun!!

I'm NOT looking for any reciprocation, so you can relax and get super comfortable. A nice shower/your body rubbed down with Victoria Secrets bath lotion, massage, have the private use of toys (no stress, no interruptions) just your own safe & consensual evening of exploration.

OK. How does this get accomplished? First of all I don't do drugs, smoke or drinking scenes nor any dive motels. Not sure where you are on this, but we can chat about it if the interest level results.

Reply back with your curiosities and we'll build some chat session around them.

YOUR privates will definitely be very warmed at your progress during the evening. Nice slow beginning with "clitoral" stimulants and then work into dual purpose vibes that add a little penetration at the same time. You'll progress at your own pace towards the evenings goal of; "multiple, pleasurable EXPERIENCES".

We'll start the evening with lunch, then a nice hotel. You can view the toys: play with them a little while your dressed... this will be the start of your body desires taking over (trust me here)... when your leaning back in a chair, and place a vibe over your privates it won't be long - you'll want more "playing".

I'm real, I'm respectable like you are and this is set up for your pleasure. Remember, I'm not looking to be your "end all" lover. Just having YOU be the center of pleasurable affection for an evening.

Sorry for the length here: I was looking to reach a comfort level with you now. Your thoughts are welcomed to make this very real, very soon.
Thanks & Good luck, Richard

Well, that's the adventure if you can be tempted to explore a little. Once your trust level builds, relaxation sets in and you're able to chill and know that I'm there to amplify your pleasures - the fun level really ratchets up a lot.

I'm serious on this as you are serious about your ad. Your safety is my first consideration. You'll find that I'm quite different than the average "older guy". I get along very well with younger ladies because of my respect for your opinions, limitations and respect different life styles.

My goal is the pleasure aspects of this that you'll enjoy. Yes!! kinda different - but it works very well.

The reward to you is...it's all for you. Besides many girls would be glad to have someone who would have attention for them but they (you) don't have to worry about any reciprocation... Kinda like what you're proposing here (only with a female - and I can respect that very much)... Well I'm real like you are and who know's; life takes many different turns.
Also I'm not a sugar daddy and NOT looking for a "street girl" - just thought this may be a different way to have some fun, for the both of us. Get away from life's routine for a night. OK, I've ranted enough. R"



Oh my god, oh my god? Oh my god.

4 comments:

  1. mmm, sounsd fantastic! a night with this guy can very clearly end one of a very select few ways:
    1) videotaped on the internet
    2) dismembered in his freezer
    3) videotaped being dismembered and placed in the freezer on the internet

    GO FOR IT!

    ReplyDelete
  2. you are... so beautiful... tooooo meeeeeeee.

    ReplyDelete
  3. OF COURSE I DID we have a date for tuesday!

    ReplyDelete